Be the Bigger person

This week I will be writing about being the bigger person in life. Everyone gets angry and wants to fire back at someone. Everyone gets hurt, or has someone that talks about them. Everyone will lose someone they thought was a friend.

What do we do when it happens to us? We let it go and be the bigger person. By reacting to someone that is trying to hurt you or talk about you, all we do is become that person. And believe me, that is the last thing you want. Think about how that person has no confidence in them-self. Think about how that person wishes to see you suffer. Think about that person who is trying to make self look better by talking about you. These people are bullies. Today they are known as “Haters.”

What is a “Hater?” A hater is someone who is jealous of you. A “Hater” is someone who can’t stand to hear about your success. They spend countless hours trying to devise plans for your demise. These people are the opposite as leaders. Stay away from them, it is only a matter of time until they will ruin theselves. There is no need to waste your time with someone like this.

Going back to martial arts in life, use your greatest self control to keep yourself in check. If you react to their negativity you are not being “the bigger person.” Haters often try their hardest to get a reaction out of you. Keep your cool, and don’t give them the satisfaction. As you have heard, “Silence is golden.” Haters have a hard time being rejected, it makes them look in the mirror and see themselves clearly. They will come to realize that no one really enjoys being around them. The only people that surround them are in fear of them.

Today, i would like you to practice what I’m talking about. If there is a co worker, a colleague, a family member who you know in your heart is “hating on you” be the bigger person and just let them keep talking. When others hear them, you won’t have to say anything. Because they said enough. Let them do the talking for you!

On a personal note, this is something I have had to do every day since deciding to do what was best for my family and my students and my team members. I will always live my life by principles. The principles of trust, character, and leadership. Whoever you follow make sure you have trust, and that you truly believe in their character and leadership. If not, make your move and never, never look back. 

Use this chart to understand why people do what they do?

1. When some talks about you-It really is just them saying how unhappy they are about themselves.

2. When someone makes fun of you-Shows their insecurity about themselves.

3. When someone put you down-Its to make them feel better

4. When someone is spending their energy to hurt you-Take it a compliment, because they are really just jealous and want to be you. They just won’t say it.

So, kids aren’t the only ones who are picked on. Adults are too,and we have two choices.

1. Don’t Fire back, and stoop to their level

2. Use self control and concentrate your energy on moving forward

Let me know your thoughts, and how you have handled “Haters.”

Funny story-My wife bought me a shirt ” I love haters” and on the back it says motivation. Use every negative in your life for motivation. Its a great way to keep focused on growing and learning more about life!

All the best,

Sensei Nick